[We ought] to be of help to all, to refrain from hurting others out of bitterness. ~Bede, Homilies on the Gospels
The world is a complicated place these days—maybe more than ever, or at least more than it has been in my lifetime. Church is complicated, families are complicated and communities are complicated. We have, as the human race, endured and inflicted a lot of pain and trauma in recent memory. So, I will not tell you not to be angry or frustrated if that is how you feel. But I will pray that your anger does not turn to bitterness, that it doesn’t form a chip on your shoulder the size of the hump on Quasimodo’s back. If the energy propelling you forward these days is that chip on your shoulder, know that it will only fuel you for so long. Bitterness runs hot and deep, but it is not regenerative. It is death, not life. It saps joy, isolates you and makes promises you can’t keep. Bitterness is not a good fruit; instead, it is a poison that will use you up, destroy your relationships and leave you in a wilderness of your own making. But thankfully, the wilderness is not the end of the story.
In the season of Lent, we have the opportunity to begin again. We can choose, with God’s help and the prayers of our community and perhaps professional assistance if needed, to practice fasting from bitter thoughts and habits. We can begin digging up the rotten grapes of unforgiveness and burning off the acidic narratives that blind us from giving and receiving God’s mercy and grace. It is now during Lent that we can begin trusting Love as our guide, even in times of anger and frustration. It may be a long journey, but it is a worthwhile one, and we do not have to travel it alone.
For Reflection
Can you distinguish between bitterness and righteous anger? Is there a spirit of bitterness in your community? If so, what would it take to begin rooting it out communally?
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