We are placed in this world, and it is in and through this world, not by the denial of it, that we shall come to know God. ~Esther De Waal, A Life~Giving Way

When our eldest child was fourteen, he let us know that he was queer. While in college, he began a committed relationship with a wonderful guy who also happened to be transgender (and who has since become a beloved member of our family). Over the years, our family has continued to grow and change, and now, all four of our children identify as LGBTQ in some way.

Like a lot of mothers, I had expectations for my children’s future, most of which were based on my experiences as a cis~gender, straight, white, middle~class woman from the United States.

But as each of our children’s unique createdness was revealed, I was presented with a choice. I could cling to my expectations of what their lives—and our common life together—would look like, or I could release my expectations and open my heart and imagination to a new reality, a new world, one populated by my most favorite humans on this planet. Had I denied their truth and clung to my expectations of who or what they would be, I would have spent the rest of my life missing out on the beauty and gifts of who they are. And I would also miss out on the unique manifestation of the Divine—the Imago Dei, the Image of God—within them.

Only in and through this world, a world in which my children and your children are their authentic selves, and not by the denial of it, have I begun to understand what it means when we say we believe in a life~giving, loving, liberating God who gives all, gathers all and draws all toward shared wholeness.

For Reflection

Is there a part of your world or life different than you expected? What might you learn about the love and nature of God through this change?

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