There is a grief that is useful and a grief that is destructive. ~Syncletica
Scientists have divided our tears into three categories: reflex tears, continuous tears and emotional tears. The first two categories are the kind of tears that help us remove toxins and debris from our eyes: smoke, onion vapers and dust. Those tears are predominantly made of water and protect our bodies from invasive elements. The last kind, emotional tears, contain different hormones and substances that are particular to the emotional reason we cry.
These tears protect us differently; they help to heal us emotionally and physically. They help us expel the hormones we don’t need, and they release the ones we do need. Good Friday seems like an appropriate day to contemplate grief and tears.
We can think about Saint Peter and the grief that led him to deny Jesus three times. We can think of Mary, the mother of Jesus, and her grief at the foot of the cross. And we can think of the two thieves, also dying on crosses to the left and right of Jesus. One, in his grief, lashes out in anger and bitterness. The other comes to Jesus with humility and openness. I wonder if the one who opened his heart to love was crying. Could it be that his tears helped heal his spirit while providing comfort to his dying flesh? What about the one who held on to bitterness and doubt? Was he stoic, clinging to his anger, unwilling to let the tears flow, refusing healing and comfort? In this picture, we see a community in pain, with Jesus in the center, and we see two different approaches. One is rooted in vulnerability, the other in control. One has the hope of resurrection; the other sees only despair. There is a grief that is useful and a grief that destroys. Both are a choice.
For Reflection
Is there a point of pain in your life or your community’s life? How are you responding?
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